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Waltz No. 3 in A Minor

Wednesday, October 8, 2008 10:54 am

If it seems like lately, all I blog about is love, bear with me, I’m having yet another growth spurt.

*Sigh…

I love music.  It is an essential part of my existence day to day.  I particularly enjoy artists who can effectively deliver a point in 3 to 5 minutes, and make success, love, confusion or even pain sound and feel so good and real. However, as much as I love music, there are times when I can not listen to anything with lyrics. Well placed words move me in such a way that I can focus on little else.

Music, like everything else, is two-sided.

Imagine being on the opposite side of that song you love…  Imagine those sadly melodic words are about your pain.  Imagine it is you who moved him to pen that love song.  Imagine it is your plight for success she sings about.  Imagine this song really is about you…

Now, imagine people listening, clueless, unconsciously mouthing the words to your story, as if it is just another tune…  Proclaiming it is their jam.

But it’s yours.

Maybe I just let it get too deep.  So at these times, I back away from the lyrics and rely on the classical compositions of Chopin, Mozart and Tchaikovsky: Music to move me, without lyrics to lead me, helplessly, where ever the artist wishes me to go.

Hence the title of this post.

I leave you with the most beautiful, saddest song in the world, (in my opinion).  Even if you think you know it, take the time and really listen to Stevie’s story.

Later,
B.

Love, music| Comments (9) »

Manly.

Monday, October 6, 2008 12:53 pm

I’m in no need for love
Stretched a sista, more than a mile
It’s not for me because
There’s no trustin’ Love

So I’m restin’ a while.

-Tweet, ‘I’m Done’

Love is easy for me.  When I decide I love you, that’s it.
I do.
And I will.
Probably, forever.

Intensity may vary, but the essence of love, always remains.

Love, for me, equals respect and loyalty.
It means, regardless of fuck ups, painful decisions, and life altering changes… I love you.
I will try to protect you, your image, your feelings…

Utterly against my will, I want only the best for you.

And I can recognize and accept, that “best,” may not be me.

…Or his best may not be enough for me.

I am not ‘secured’ by my love.
Meaning, the rest of me isn’t guaranteed, as a result of my heart being fond of him.

In fact, if my heart is too fond of him, sometimes I can push him away.
I don’t need love clouding my decision making.

Cause, I can’t live the rest of my life on just love.

So I’ve learned how to
Love,
Separate from like.
Separate from commit.
Separate from lust.

My friends say this makes me “manly.”

I say it makes me smart.

Especially because,
There’s no trustin’ Love.

B.

Love, life lessons| Comments (8) »

It must be Love.

Tuesday, September 30, 2008 9:02 pm

So I completed my first short story today.

Yes. First. Sounds funny for a woman who has known for a long while that she wanted to be a writer, but it’s true.  I thought about this a lot today as I put finishing touches on my story and drove to the post office to send it off.  “This is my first, finished story.”

It gave me a funny feeling.  An “I just know that is what I should be doing with my life” feeling.  A warm feeling.  A sense of peace and completion.

It felt like…

Like being in love.

Well, what I want being in love to feel like anyway.

For me, Love has been a very odd thing.  Something I have learned to manage very separate from myself, (this is a whole ‘nother blog topic).

But if I ever truly decide to let love in…

It better feel like it did when I finished my first story…

lol.

Later,

B.

BTW, I noticed something.  People leave me comments, and the people who read the comments think I don’t respond to comments because generally, I do not comment in my own comment box…  But guess what?  I usually email the people who comment directly rather than responding in the comment box!  Aaaah, I get it. I gotta comment in my own box…

Love, iWrite| Comments (13) »